First fragment of my past life of '87

I've lost everything I've ever owned several times.  So like some kind of hedonistical robot I only live in the now.  Things only serve to hold you down, it's far too easy to have had that reversal where things own you.

Some time 17 years ago however I was given a bunch of boxes of my past, which I had thought were lost forever.  Oddly enough I was to lose it all in a few more years.  The boxes were stuffed with so many relics from my past: photographs, negatives, year books, old books, tapes, programs, trading cards.  My past in mass produced goods.  At the time it felt so nice to have gotten that box of my past back in the winter of 2002.  I had planned on scanning it all, to save it, but of course I got distracted in the day to day, and I never did get around to it.

I'm sure it's in some landfill around Clarksville TN.

I had always thought I had lost them all, but then while looking for some old random download that had been purged from the internet I came across some pictures, in a folder simply called "ME".

That is when I found this.

This is my class, back in the 87-88 school year back in Regency Acres Public School of Aurora Ontario.  I was 12 years old, and in grade 7 at the time.

It's not a very high resolution picture, I think that's why I stopped scanning stuff as the scanner really was doing a terrible job.  Or maybe it was just a limit of the times, as I'd received a bunch of office junk from work, and it was no doubt some ancient HP scanjet from the 90's at best.  Sadly it predates EXIF so I don't have any information in this.

Looking at this picture it's so odd, so many smiles, but I can safely say there was not much to smile about.  Let's just say I didn't have a fun experience at school.  Sadly this is the only picture I have before I was in my 20's.  Although it doesn't matter so much, there are literally dozens of ones just like this one.

Such is the fate of a mass produced good.

Grade 7 is the penultimate year of grade school.  Soon we'd be off to high school where the first round of elimination would happen.  Then off to further schooling as needed.  Some would, in fact never leave school, finding themselves in the place of teachers.  But trapped in this moment we were still tweens about to make life altering and other massive changes.  There would never be any going back to this frozen moment in time.  There is such incredible human potential in this image.  Sometimes I wonder what became of it.  I only know my part.  As we moved I didn't keep touch with anyone.

As for me?

I'm still the same daydreaming kid, sleepwalking through life.

The middle age thing is real as I look at 45 knowing full well that it's all downhill from here.